I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize