My sheets look like a crime scene.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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