at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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