And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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