I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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