By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
