Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
