I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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