WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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