i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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