Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
