I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Welp...herpes.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
