I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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