Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
