we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
