there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize