I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize