I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize