Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
