So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize