If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
We have so much sex to catch up on
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
