called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
