Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize