Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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