Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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