and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize