I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
