So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
this hospital has no fireball
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion