I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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