Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
