How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
