It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
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