No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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