It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
