Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize