My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
