Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i think i have herpe
just one?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
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Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
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