when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
