Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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