A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
