she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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