Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
