Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i came on her dog
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize