I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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