We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
