sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
