I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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