I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You ruined the universe
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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