please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Randomize
