I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
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