tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
