Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
