At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She's the barista slut.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
